Tag: rebel media

Tom Mulcair, Olivia Chow and the NDP’s huge anti-Semitic problem

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

This early election call by Conservative Prime Minister Harper caught Liberal Justin Trudeau with his pants down.

But more seriously for NDP Leader Mulcair, this early election call has left Mulcair and his party easily exposed to being attacked by both the federal Liberals and Conservatives as being a federal party sympathetic to anti-Semitism because the party’s key supporters – such unions as the Canadian Union of Postal Workers (CUPW) and the Canadian Union of Public Employees (CUPE-Ontario) – are hateful anti-Semites.

In this federal campaign Mulcair will try to present himself as a fair-minded, competent prime minister in waiting. But he leads a party riddled with crazy, hateful whack jobs. Many of whom are virulently anti-Israel and anti-Semitic.

Let me explain.

Recall Prime Minister Harper, in an historic speech in Israel, publicly denounced a new strain of anti-Semitism that is spreading throughout the Canadian body politic. Specifically, Harper labeled supporters and advocates of the anti-Israel BDS movement and the pernicious concept of “Israel apartheid” as anti-Semites.

As Harper so eloquently stated in his “Fire and Water” Israeli speech:

But, in much of the western world, the old hatred has been translated into more sophisticated language for use in polite society.

People who would never say they hate and blame the Jews for their own failings or the problems of the world, instead declare their hatred of Israel and blame the only Jewish state for the problems of the Middle East.

As once Jewish businesses were boycotted, some civil-society leaders today call for a boycott of Israel. On some campuses, intellectualized arguments against Israeli policies thinly mask the underlying realities, such as the shunning of Israeli academics and the harassment of Jewish students.

Most disgracefully of all, some openly call Israel an apartheid state…

It is nothing short of sickening.

Harper was not breaking new ground in his denunciation of the new anti-Semitism.

Harper was publicly espousing the EU’s working definition of anti-Semitism  specifically, the EU’s Monitoring Centre on Racism and Xenophobia (EUMC – superseded in 2007 by the Fundamental Rights Agency.) In 2005, the EUMC definition of anti-Semitism included the following examples:

Denying the Jewish people the right to self-determination, e.g. by claiming that the existence of a state of Israel is a racist endeavor;

Applying double standards by requiring of Israel a behavior not expected or demanded of any other democratic nation;

In addition, then Liberal MP and former Justice Minister Irwin Cotler, on behalf of the Federal Liberal party, further expanded on the new anti-Semitism which included political anti-Semitism – denial of the Jewish people’s right to self-determination; de-legitimization of Israel as a state (flowing from Israel apartheid rationale); attributions to Israel of all the world’s evils – and economic anti-Semitism – BDS movements and the extraterritorial application of restrictive covenants against countries trading with Israel.

Similarly, on March 1, 2010, in an open letter, Michael Ignatieff, then leader of the Federal Liberal Party, also echoed the above sentiments that describing Israel as an “apartheid state” and supporting the BDS movement against it, amount to anti-Semitism.

Ignatieff persuasively argued:

“On university campuses across the country this week, Israeli Apartheid Week will once again attempt to demonize and undermine the legitimacy of the Jewish state. It is part of a global campaign of calls for divestment, boycotts and proclamations, and it should be condemned unequivocally and absolutely.

Apartheid is defined, in international law, as a crime against humanity. Israeli Apartheid Week is a deliberate attempt to portray the Jewish state as criminal……

Let us be clear: criticism of Israeli government policy is legitimate. Wholesale condemnation of the State of Israel and the Jewish people is not legitimate. Not now, not ever.”

In addition, in 2010 the Ontario legislature with the support of all three parties unanimously condemned Israeli Apartheid Week in Ontario as “odious, hateful and inappropriate, in the case of Israel.

In sum, we have at least two major federal parties, the Liberals and the Conservatives in Ottawa and three Ontario provincial parties which consider support for “Israeli apartheid and the BDS movement” at least odious and hateful, and in some cases anti-Semitic.

Note that Mulcair and the federal NDP party have failed to equally denounce Israeli Apartheid and the BDS movement because some of the NDP’s most ardent supporters, for example, the Canadian Union of Postal Workers, whom Tom Mulcair and his Ontario lieutenant Olivia Chow have publicly supported, are front and centre in the Canadian anti-Israeli “Israeli Apartheid” organization and the infamous Canadian anti-Israeli BDS movement.

In 2008 CUPW passed a resolution that the union will work “with Palestinian solidarity and human rights organizations to develop an educational campaign about the apartheid nature of the Israeli state and the political and economic support of Canada for these practices.”

The CUPW resolution also called on Israel to recognize the Palestinian people’s “right to return to their homes as stipulated in UN Resolution 194” – a demand by Palestinian negotiators that would virtually erase the Jewish state.”

Other groups that are pro Israeli Apartheid and the BDS movement, and supporters of  Tom Mulcair, Olivia Chow and the NDP include the Canadian Union of Public Employees-Ontario and rabble.ca, an influential Canadian left wing online journal. Rabble.ca is published by Kim Elliott, the spouse of former NDP Deputy Leader Libby Davies who in June 2010 expressed support for the boycott, sanctions and divestment campaign against Israel. Ms. Davies is a former NDP colleague of Ms. Chow and Tom Mulcair.

It is noteworthy that in his 2009 autobiography, former Canadian Auto Workers president Buzz Hargrove wrote that he was “all for” union leaders taking up activist causes, but criticized union leaders who had taken the Israel file too far:

“Now and then, someone in the labour movement makes a wrong turn or fires a salvo at the wrong target, which casts a pall over the entire movement,” he wrote. “One thing you can’t do as head of a union is to allow the most vocal, and usually most radical, minority to dominate your thinking on issues or the decision-making process.”

Olivia Chow represented the Toronto federal riding of Trinity-Spadina from 2006-2014. For many years, during that period, the University of Toronto, in her riding, hosted and celebrated the hateful Israeli Apartheid Week. Not once during that time did Chow ever publicly denounce either “Israeli Apartheid” or the anti-Israeli BDS movement.

During the 2014 Toronto mayoral race, Chow publicly supported the noxious, anti-Semitic Queers Against Israeli Apartheid (QuAIA) right to participate in the 2014 Toronto Pride parade, notwithstanding the principled and vehement opposition of her opponents John Tory and Doug Ford.

I am not suggesting that either Tom Mulcair or Ms. Chow is anti-Semitic or that either espouses anti-Semitic views or that either even agrees with the anti-Semitic views of the groups which support them and whom they support.

But during this federal election, it is now time for Tom Mulcair and Ms. Chow to take responsibility for their silence and to publicly denounce unequivocally the anti-Semitic positions of some of their supporters, as former CAW president Hargrove did.

Or Mr. Mulcair and Ms. Chow and the whole federal NDP Party run the risk of being tarred with the same odious brush.

Crony socialism at work: Mulcair’s national childcare scheme and Olivia Chow’s dirty little secret

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

The politically undead zombie Olivia Chow is back.

Lock your doors, hide your children!

And above all, hold onto your hard-earned tax dollars because zombie Chow and her fellow federal NDP monsters smell your money, hunger for your tax dollars and are inexorably slouching to your doors to suck all your cash dry.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

Olivia Chow, who for over 3 decades, has never had a real job in the private sector.

Who has never owned a small business or had to meet payroll.

Or has never had to pay business taxes, pay outrageous utility costs or deal with government red tape.

Chow, who has only known about sticking her snout in the public trough.

For thirty years the majority of Chow’s employment expenses and personal expenses have been paid by Canadian taxpayers.

Also Chow, unlike the majority of Canadians, enjoys a very generous City of Toronto pension and an over the top generous federal MP pension.

But for the power-hungry Chow, that is clearly not enough.

Chow is back running for the federal NDP in the new Toronto riding of Spadina-Fork York.

Recall that Chow, a career politician without equal, is a former Metro Toronto councilor, former  City Toronto councilor, a former NDP MP, a former failed candidate for  Toronto mayor,  and now former almost instructor at Ryerson University.

Chow is running on one of Mulcair’s major planks, a national child care program which within four years the NDP claim will create about 370,000 affordable daycare spaces at an annual federal cost of about $2 billion.

Ultimately ramping up to $5 billion per year. More realistically, best case scenario is that 50% of the spaces will be created at more than twice the cost.

In Ontario, there are tons of problems with this financially and fiscally irresponsible scheme.

Which cannot be dismissed by Chow’s simplistic and silly sloganeering of “but, it’s for the children.”

The NDP federal scheme requires that debt and deficit-ridden Ontario kick in 40% of the costs, funds the Ontario government does not have. Recall that Ontario is already throwing billions of dollars of borrowed money per year funding full-day kindergarten.

The current full day kindergarten system is not sustainable, let alone a whole new NDP childcare program.

More importantly, Chow neglects to state that in order to fund the NDP portion, the NDP will levy higher taxes on corporations (leading to potential job losses or additional costs for consumers as corporations pass the increased costs onto consumers.)

Also Mulcair promises to eliminate Harper’s income splitting program, which will increases taxes and costs on many middle class families as well.

But even more importantly, this national affordable daycare program will fail, as did the Liberal national housing program of the ‘80s, because this program will create a huge federal bureaucracy, cost double and triple its estimated costs and will fail to deliver sufficient affordable daycare spaces.

It also follows that limited affordable daycare space will inevitably go those most politically-connected, i.e. NDP-connected families.

One of the key reasons the failed Liberal national affordable housing scheme of the 80s was terminated was that a large number of affordable co-op housing was enjoyed by City of Toronto politically-connected NDP types, not the hard-working Toronto families who really were desperate for such low cost housing.

Similarly, the majority of the NDP’s affordable daycare spaces will be enjoyed by politically connected NDP families, not necessarily the most deserving Toronto families.

Talk about crony socialism.

And with that my friends, by way of a long-winded discussion, I come back to Olivia Chow, who in the ‘80s, with her husband, Jack Layton, together earning $120,000, jumped the queue ahead of thousands of more deserving Toronto families (who had been waitlisted for years) and scored a below market three-bedroom publicly-subsidized co-op apartment in the infamous Hazelburn Co-op, here in sunny downtown Toronto.

Chow has never apologized and never repented.

And she is back to take your money again to help out NDP-connected families at your expense.

(Photo: Tania Liu, Creative Commons licence)

It’s all about Olivia: Mulcair makes his own Eve Adams blunder

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

NDP Leader Tom Mulcair just committed his worst political blunder of this ongoing unofficial federal election campaign. He permitted and in fact promoted the candidacy of Olivia Chow to run as the federal NDP candidate in the newly-formed downtown Toronto Spadina-Fort York riding.

Yes, that Olivia Chow! Yesterday’s, Yesterday’s, Yesterday’s Woman. Holier than Chow. The Yoko Ono of federal politics. Chow has more political baggage than Imelda Marcos has shoes.

Chow is back from the political dead. The NDP’s own version of the Zombie Apocalyspe.

Note: zombies are undead creatures, typically depicted as mindless, reanimated human corpses with a hunger for human flesh.

In the case of NDP Chow, she is a mindless, reanimated human corpse with a hunger for hard-working Canadian taxpayers’ money, government hand-outs, government pensions and large taxpayer-funded personal expense accounts. And since Mulcair is competitive, the zombie Chow has a new found hunger for political power.

Before we know it, other long dead NDP hateful, anti-Israel wingnuts as Libby Davies and Svend Robinson, will be making their own zombie comebacks.

Mulcair, a Quebec-based politician, like the clueless Trudeau – who promoted the toxic Eve Adams in Eglinton-Lawrence – does not know frack all about Toronto politics.

In the recent Toronto city mayoral election, Chow was thoroughly humiliated as she came in a very distant third (23%,) losing to John Tory (40%) and Doug Ford (33%).

Chow did not even carry the municipal wards of her former federal riding of Trinity-Spadina.

Chow lost with good reason.

Chow came across as a horrible politician and public figure. She was inarticulate, ill-informed, uninspiring and generally confused and ignorant about the issues.

When Chow stupidly and arrogantly favored buses for Scarberians as opposed to subways, she lost all of the suburban vote and the whole election right then and there.

No one believed or trusted Chow when she talked out of two sides of her mouth. On one side, Chow talked fiscal prudence; on the other side, Chow promised budget-breaking and expensive social programs for children and unemployed youth.

Chow’s pathetic political performance exposed a harsh political truth.

Chow’s previous political success, especially in federal politics, was clearly as a result Chow riding the coat tails of her charismatic, charming and articulate husband, Jack Layton.

And without Layton or his people to prop up the wooden Chow, she fell dramatically on her political face.

Mulcair and his people think that in this upcoming federal election, Chow will fare better as she is running in Spadina-Fort York. Parts of this new federal riding constitute her old federal riding of Trinity-Spadina, which she represented as an NDP MP prior to her ill-fated attempt to run for Toronto city mayor.

But this time, Chow faces a formidable, street-fighting opponent in incumbent Liberal MP Adam Vaughan, who has already publicly and mercilessly lambasted Chow for being a power-hungry cynical, opportunist and serial quitter. Accusing of Chow of quitting Ottawa to run for the Toronto mayor. And now quitting Ryerson as a visiting instructor to run once again federally for the NDP in parts of her old riding.

This federal campaign will be down and dirty and nasty. And thoroughly enjoyable.

I predict Chow will once again be humiliated in defeat.

But more importantly, the very fact that Mulcair has put his good name behind Chow, this radical socialist tax and spend, anti-biz, anti-private sector, John Sewell-like scary/crazy career pol from the 80s will hurt Mulcair personally and the NDP brand in all of Ontario.

For conservative political pundits, the return of the politically unrepentant and undead zombie Chow is like Christmas and Hanukah in July.

In the next few months we are going to have so much fun driving political stakes in that cold-hearted Chow.

Check out the undead Chow’s recent campaign announcement. Her mouth is moving, but not the rest of her face. She is mouthing the words. But her eyes do not move. She is soulless, as Mulcair pulls her strings. Scary.

Chow’s campaign is going to be a freaking horror show.

I can’t wait.

Magic Mike XXL could teach Patrick Brown’s Ontario PCs a thing or two

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Entertainment

(MATURE CONTENT WARNING) What better way is there to spend Canada Day than with a hundred screaming women (ages 20 to 70) in a suburban theatre watching the Channing Tatum sequel to the very successful Magic Mike?

We are in an exciting and interesting time here in Ontario. The Ontario Progressive party under its new young and vigorous leader, Patrick Brown, is trying to evolve and grow from its deep rural roots and become more progressive, more suburban, more urbane, and apparently more tolerant and inclusive. And definitely more LGBTQ.

Hence the very successful, loud, proud Conservative contingent of 60+ strong, led by Brown and his feisty colleague Ontario PC MPP Lisa MacLeod, in the recent Toronto Pride Parade.

And so it also just seems fitting to review a strangely compelling male stripper flick here in the deeply blue conservative, but highly iconoclastic pages of the Rebel.

Magic Mike XXL is clearly superior to the original Magic Mike. Okay, it is no Godfather II. But then againGodfather III was no Godfather II.

Magic Mike, in addition to starring Channing Tatum as Magic Mike – handyman by day and male stripper by night – also starred suddenly hot-again Mathew McConaughey as Dallas, the sleazy strip club owner and manager of the male stripping troupe, the “Kings of Tampa.”

This film was part female fantasy (half-naked, hard-bodied male strippers,) part romantic comedy as (Magic Mike trying to woo Brooke, his stripper buddy’s sister) and part moralistic drama, as one Mike’s young stripper protégés becomes too heavily involved in drugs and the stripper lifestyle, with its (apparently!) attendant violence.

Though directed by indie great Steven Soderbergh, the film did not hang together and was mostly forgettable. Magic XXL, on the hand, is more focused, with a simpler but more interesting and meaningful  storyline.

Gone is the sleazy, over the top acting of McConaughey.

In this film, the boys are back, with the “Kings of Tampa” taking centre stage – both literally and figuratively. The male strippers from Magic Mike – now self-identified as male entertainers -include aptly named Big Dick Richie (Joe Manganiello,) Tarzan (Kevin Nash,) Tito (Adam Rodriquez) and Ken (Matt Bomer.)

The story focuses on a male strippers’ convention at Myrtle Beach, which may be the Kings of Tampa’s last show together: Some of these guys are getting a little long in the tooth -Tarzan, though still a strapping example of manhood, appears to be suffering from arthritic knees  whenever he deep bends and painfully whips off his tearaway pants to expose his skimpy Speedos.

Others have outside business interests which demand their full attention – Magic Mike’s growing custom furniture business, Ken’s acting career and Tito’s start-up mobile frozen yogurt operation. Sensing that this may be their last hurrah – and the last time they each experience  hundreds of  screaming women sticking sweaty dollars bills in their jockeys – the boys embark on one last road trip from Tampa to Myrtle Beach.

The high point of the film, at least for me, is when these guys are cracking wise, bonding, kibitzing on and off the bus, and coming clean to each other and to us, the audience. We learn that Tarzan is a painter, a Marine and Desert Storm veteran, and Ken is a sensitive, struggling actor trying to increase his online presence. (I can certainly relate to that.)

Big Dick Richie reveals to his buddies that, though he’s a great-looking guy with tons of female admirers, he has not had sex in six months because he possesses a tragic flaw – an unusually ginormous member that apparently intimidates and repels all potential female partners.

Magic Mike also reveals that though he owns a home, a dog and a thriving furniture business, he cannot find his one true love with whom to settle down and produce award-winning underwear models, Brooke having exited stage left along with Dallas since the original film.

During this memorable road trip, the boys are invited back to a fancy southern plantation where they entertain 40-something, sexually frustrated southern belles led by Nancy (the still beautiful and radiant Andie MacDowell,) providing life affirming and empowering advice and pleasure, while gyrating and singing boy band covers.

Big Dick Richie and Nancy hook up, as Richie has finally found his opposite number, that one elusive woman who fits the proverbial glass slipper. Her yin to his wang, so to speak.

As in all great cinematic cheerleader competitions (Bring it On) or a cappella sing-offs, (Pitch Perfect 1 and 2) the boys realized that they must re-invent themselves and their numbers. Take risks. Throw out their tired old routines and create entirely new ones that truly reflect their passions and their identities for a broader audience.

In much the same way, Brown’s new and invigorated Ontario PC Party, after four consecutive and devastating electoral defeats, have had to throw out the old routines, the old advisers and the old way of doing politics and looking at politics. Electoral success has not been won in the past and will not be won in the future by merely energizing your hard core but declining conservative rural base.

As a straight heterosexual male, I was not moved by the male entertainers’ onstage performances per se, but I can see this film’s overall and broad appeal to both women and the LGBTQ community, and the subversive charm of these guys who simply want to bring fun and joy to their female customers’ lives – and also to their core gay viewing public.

But I did enjoy the male bonding, joking and camaraderie among the bros and the very funny and strong cameo appearances by such strong actresses as MacDowell, Jada Pinkett Smith and Elizabeth Banks. Not only does the film sequel hit a home run with its core gay and female audience, I believe it will successfully resonate with straight dudes, young and not so young as well, for the above reasons.

The lesson of Magic Mike XXL for Brown’s Ontario PC Party is to still appeal to the base, but also to take risks, be innovative, be different and go after those outside the base, for greater political appeal, support and ultimate political success. Also, a stuffed tube sock down the y-fronts might help; we can’t all be Big Dick Richie, after all.

City planner Jennifer Keesmaat: Today Toronto, tomorrow the world

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

(CONTENT WARNING: Satire) High profile Toronto Chief Planner Jennifer Keesmaat suddenly resigned her position yesterday.

According to anonymous and unreliable union sources employed at City Hall, Keesmaat – frustrated by being muzzled by Mayor John Tory during the recent epic debate surrounding the fate of the eastern portion of Gardiner Expressway – decided to throw in the towel, and called it quits at City Hall.

Keesmaat had also publicly gone on Twitter and publicly tweeted her support for her position and tried to shame Tory into changing his position.

“@johntory: tyme2 show some cojones+ #deep6GardEast” – @jen_keesmaat

“@johntory: bikes be4 hiways, bro! Yur hybrid=another DumbTrack” – @jen_keesmaat

It did not help Ms. Keesmaat with the mayor and his supporters on council when in March, at an event hosted by the Urban Land Institute, Keesmaat embarrassed Mayor Tory by publicly correcting Mayor Tory, not once but twice when Tory was called upon to respond to questions about the planner’s budget.

Obviously referring to Toronto’s previous mayor as well, Keesmaat was heard to mutter, “What’s the deal with you old white guys? Why is math so difficult for you guys?”

According to the Globe & Mail, Keesmaat also did not endear herself to certain male councillors repping the Toronto suburbs, when she referred to them, as “insufferable Neanderthal knuckle-dragging troglodytes” for their continued support of the use of the automobile as a means of transport from the suburbs of Etobicoke, North York and Scarborough to downtown Toronto and throughout the GTA.

To his credit James Pasternak, councilor for North York Ward 10, had previously publicly criticized Keesmaat for her highly impolitic comments when, referring to Keesmaat, he stated, “To take to the air waves and trumpet your own  personal beliefs when you’re serving a city council and serving a mayor, for many around here, that’s going too far.”

To Keesmaat and her loony leftist supporters on City Council, such as Joe Mihevc and Paula Fletcher,  “cars and trucks should neither be seen or heard south of Highway 401”.

If Keesmaat had the power, she would ban cars and trucks from downtown Toronto entirely.

Rumour has it that Keesmaat has been urged to throw her hat in the political ring and challenge Mayor Tory in 2018.

Maggie Atwood, political activist and sometime author recently took to Twitter.

“@jen_keesmaat: We got yur back. #BuryGardiner+Toryin2018” – @MargaretAtwood

As Keesmaat was leaving City Hall, she sounded almost Churchillian as she issued these parting words to her cheering supporters and the press:

“We may have lost this battle against cars, but we have not lost the war against cars.

“As for you gas-guzzling and carbon-emitting suburbanites, we shall fight you on the Lakeshore. We shall fight you in the Beaches. Er, Beach. Whatever.

“We shall fight you in the hills (Forest Hill) and the valleys (Rosedale.)

“We shall never allow this island of old and new wealth and white privilege to be befouled by you and your kind and your mobile instruments of death and destruction.”

It looks like we have not heard the last of the unsinkable and unstoppable Jennifer Keesmaat.

Leafs blame Residential Schools for decades of losses, demand reparations

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Entertainment

(CONTENT WARNING: Satire) Yesterday, Maple Leaf President Brendan Shanahan held a press conference to announce the findings of a five year investigation by the Maple Leaf organization into the cause of the Leafs’ decades of incompetence, ineptitude and simply lousy hockey.

Standing outside of the former Maple Leaf Gardens on Carlton Street – now Loblaws, a fancy fruit and produce emporium – and flanked by former Leaf legends Wendel Clark and Doug Gilmour – Shanahan  laid the blame for the Maple Leafs’ horrible decline since the 1960s on the notorious Catholic Church-sponsored residential school system.

According to the Shanahan, up until 1968 (1967 being the last year that the Leafs won the Stanley Cup) the Leafs had won thirteen Stanley Cup championships, second only to the twenty-four championship, won by their arch rival, the Montreal Canadiens.

But apparently during the 1968 hockey season, then Leaf captain George “the Chief” Armstrong (whose mother was part Ojibway) often spoke in the locker room about the experience of his distant second cousin by marriage. As a young Ojibway man, several decades prior to the 1968 hockey season, Armstrong’s cousin was a day student at the residential school near George’s hometown.

This school was run by Catholic nuns and they demanded that George’s cousin wear a jacket, shirt, tie and grey flannel pants every day to class, be on time, do his homework and study every night. The nuns would rap his knuckles every time he failed to do or complete his homework. Furthermore, the nuns would not let his cousin play his beloved hockey unless he successfully completed his studies.

According to Shanahan, Armstrong’s teammates were shocked by this blatant mistreatment of George’s second cousin. Over the subsequent years, Armstrong would retell this horrible tale again and again to his distraught teammates.

And after awhile, consistent with the Leafs’ oral tradition, even after Armstrong’s retirement as a Leaf,  this apocryphal story would be passed on, season after season to subsequent Leaf teams.

According to Shanahan, the impact of this residential school story on the Toronto Maple Leafs has been profound, the damage seemingly permanent.

Since 1968 the Toronto Maple Leafs have never won a Stanley Cup championship. Since 1969 the same Leafs had never even made it to the final series of a Stanley Cup championship.

The Leafs’ historic culture of fishing for the puck around the net and aggressively hunting for goals has been dramatically transformed to a culture of  defeat and dysfunction. A never-ending cycle of dependence on booze (beer commercial endorsements) and drugs (to deaden the pain of perpetual defeat and vicious cross-checks by opposing players,) especially among the younger players on the Maple Leaf teams.

Shanahan did admit that the white British colonizers (the Weston family, owners of Loblaws) brutally taking the hallowed lands of the Leafs – the Gardens on Carlton – in part contributed to the Leafs’ downfall.

The loss of CBC’s Hockey Night in Canada dealt another blow to the Leafs’ fortunes.

Accordingly, Shanahan issued a set of 94 demands which must be implemented immediately by the NHL and the Wynne and Harper governments.  Prominent among the demands:

A full apology by the Pope to current and past Leaf players and their victimized fans.

A full restoration of funding to the CBC and the return of Hockey Night in Canada.

The replacement of hockey host George Stromboulopoulos with the dynamic duo of Don Cherry and Rod McLean.

The press conference concluded as hundreds of Leaf Nation survivors gathered around Shanahan, Clark and Gilmour in healing circles, locked hands, swayed and chanted together: “Go Leafs, Go.”

Harper and Mulcair reach out to the adulterer vote

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

(CONTENT WARNING: Mature language and satire) In a brilliant media coup, a newly formed consortium of Netflix, Cineplex and Ashley Madison, the notorious dating website for cheating spouses, has secured the exclusive rights to host and broadcast the fifth, last and probably most important federal election debate between Prime Minister Stephen Harper and NDP Opposition Leader Tom Mulcair.

Noel Biderman, the King of Infidelity and the driving force behind this counter-cultural consortium, affectionately dubbed “Woodstock”, held a news conference today at the Toronto Four Seasons, the site of the final and probably epic Harper/Mulcair debate.

Biderman was flanked by his partners Netflix co-founder and CEO Reed Hastings and Ellis Jacob, CEO of Cineplex.

Biderman proclaimed, “The old, fat consortium of CBC, Global, CTV and Radio-Canada is so 1999. Especially, the CBC. It is done. Finito. It is time to stick a fork in it.

“Welcome to the future, bitches.”

Biderman continued, “Millions of Canadians are voting with their feet, cutting their tv cables and joining Netflix. Millions of Canadians every day  are experiencing the thrills of Cineplex films, in state of the art Cineplex theatres throughout Canada. And of course, millions of Canadians are having extra-marital flings or fantasizing about having such sexy hook-ups. And Ashley Madison has been there to help fulfill these dreams.

“The actual debate will take place here at the Four Seasons’ d/bar, the home and inspiration for countless trysts, casual encounters and nascent affairs. I will host the one-on-one, no holds barred debate between Prime Minister Harper and NDP leader Mulcair.

“This debate will be broadcast free of charge online through Netflix, in both official languages and in many other unofficial languages. And in all Cineplex theatres throughout the country, for those who do not have access to the internet.

“The consortium will also be working with such popular sites and apps as Twitter, Instagram, YouTube, Tinder, Tumblr, Grindr, Vine, Vice, Uber, Spotify, many of which sound really cool, but I don’t know what the f**k they actually do.”

“We are confident that our consortium will broadcast to over 15 million potential Canadian voters!”

Kory Teneycke, spokesman for the federal Conservatives, stated, “When Noel first approached us, we were a little skeptical.  But when he showed us the hard numbers of how many millions of male and female Canadians cheat on their spouses, same sex partners, common law spouses, girlfriends, boyfriends,  even their casual ‘friends with benefits,’ we were frankly blown away.

Apparently “stepping out on your man or woman” cuts across all income, racial, ethnic, religious, geographic and political lines, from Victoria, BC to Come by Chance, Newfoundland.  (Pun intended)

It appears that adultery is as Canadian as hockey or a Tim Hortons “double double”.

Teneycke also added, “As you know, our official position is that times have changed, and all political parties must change with the times. And we did not believe that the traditional debate format proposed by the CBC-led consortium properly addressed the pressing issues affecting current hard working Canadians.”

“Our unofficial position, off the record, is that we believe that CBC (and to a lesser extent CTV, Global and Radio-Canada) is filled with left-leaning, anti-Harper, anti-Conservative,  a-holes who willingly engage in self-flagellation at the mere mention of  the Second Coming of Trudeau Jr.. So any time we can stick it to those Omar Khadr-loving lefties, is a bonus for us.”

NDP leader Tom Mulcair echoed these very same sentiments, when he stated, “We welcome the involvement and sponsorship of the fifth debate by the team of Netflix, Cineplex and of course, Ashley Madison.”

“I understand many NDP members are frequent and regular visitors to the Ashley Madison site, especially our Quebec wing. Consisting of former BQ members, whose loyalties, how do you say in English, are always fluid and suspect.”

“As you also know, the NDP party prides itself on being a ‘Big Tent.’ On being inclusive and expansive.

And attracting all kinds of rogues, reprobates and scum-sucking bottom feeders.”

Congratulations to Patrick Brown

by Mitch Wolfe, posted in Politics

This was supposed to be a coronation for Christine Elliott. Instead, the queen in waiting pulled a Hillary Clinton circa 2008 and lost to a relatively unknown candidate, who out hustled and out organized her. And thoroughly destroyed Elliott in all parts of the province. Even in the GTA. Even in Ford Nation, notwithstanding the support of the Ford brothers.

I like Christine Elliott as a person. She has substance. She was a practicing lawyer, a business person, a mother who raised three sons, and a terrifically supportive partner of her husband Jim Flaherty.  She has been a tireless campaigner for the Conservative cause and an excellent MPP for her riding.

Ms. Elliott has integrity. She has character. In sum, a mensch.

But she is not and has never been leadership material.

Notwithstanding all of Elliott’s strong qualities and intelligence, she performed very weakly at Queen’s Park. Her opponents Vic Fedeli and Lisa MacLeod – though not as well known as Ms. Elliott – day by day hammered the McGuinty and then the Wynne government over its many scandals: OLG, Ornge, the cancellation of the gas plants, the deletion of the emails,  and MARS2.

For the most part, Elliott was missing in action. She just did not come across as tough and strong, even in opposition.

Despite all of Elliott’s experience and intelligence and alleged knowledge of the provincial issues, Elliott’s campaign was a disaster. She came across as painfully boring and a totally uninspiring speaker, reminiscent of the disastrous Olivia Chow, during her pathetic attempt to win the Toronto mayoral race.

What were Elliott and her brain trust thinking when they assumed the same Yonge Street location as the political headquarters of Olivia Chow? Talk about bad karma. Talk about guilt by location.

To a large extent Elliott snatched defeat from the jaws of victory. She showed very poor judgment in apparently just relying upon support from her caucus, who failed to deliver their own people in their own ridings. Elliott also seemed to just rely upon the same political advisers and political elites who were responsible for Tory defeats in the last four elections.

Talk about the gang who could not shoot straight!

To Brown’s credit, he was not another right wing tone-deaf socially conservative Tim Hudak clone.

To the surprise of Elliott and her people, Brown pulled a Jason Kenney and he went out to all the socially conservative new Canadian groups, in the 905 areas and beyond, and brought in a ton of new Conservative supporters, among the South Asian, Tamil, Arab, Muslim and Asian communities.

Brown and his people did what Elliott should have done. Gone out and brought in new members, from the ethnic communities who had gradually gravitated to the federal Conservative fold through the efforts of Kenney and Harper.

Instead, Elliott played it safe. She made few errors, but she was destroyed nonetheless.

Though the left wing media has and will paint Brown as a hard core right wing nut, he is and will be a formidable opponent to Premier Wynne. He is very likeable. He is charming. He is young, smart and very aggressive.

Not only did Brown attract thousands and thousands of new members from previously non Conservative communities. More importantly he and his organization were able to successfully get these new Conservatives to come out and vote – a true test of Brown’s organizational skills and formidable ground game, in this case reminiscent of Obama’s successful ground game.

Premier Wynne, be afraid. Be very afraid. Your time in office is well past due. And the new invigorated Conservatives are stronger than ever and they are coming after you and your scandal-ridden government.